Cheers to 2 years -- Happy Celibaversary to me!!!! |
Many
celebrate the day they got baptized as their commitment to God, but my baptism
wasn't real, it was simply me trying to be spared from hell. But today I
celebrate 2 years of Celibacy (My Celibaversary) yay!!….
and for me this day is far more significant because on November 12, 2013 I made a vow to God that I would not have sex
until I got married and this was the beginning of my commitment,that I will surrender my life
to God 'for real'.
Honestly,
I lived a promiscuous life for so long that I knew my two biggest challenges
with being a Christian would be giving up sex and partying. So in order for me
to really stick to this commitment, I would need 'divine intervention'. Today
I'm very proud of myself and I know God is proud of me too for taking the step
to glorify Him with my body and not live in hypocrisy and lukewarmness anymore.
" I have been crucified with Christ, and it
is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now
live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave
Himself up for me" - Galatians 2:20
I
remember a series of events led up to this decision; after my 'failed'
engagement (see story here My Engagement Story), I had either to go back to
the my familiar place of being the side chick (see story here Being the Other Woman) or face the fears of
singleness. So I took the easy route and went back... this lasted a month
because I had such a strong conviction, I spent everyday being angry or
depressed and I really wanted out!!
The HOLY SPIRIT IS SO
REAL!!!
When
I told my friends, of course they laughed at me and when I told him he laughed
harder as everyone said they would give me two (2) weeks for the 'holiness' to
wear off before I would go back to normal i.e. stuck in this relationship. But
years later, apparently I had just gotten 'crazier' lolol.....
It is such an awesome and liberating feeling though to not be a
slave to sin..
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed
(John 8:36)
Now
let me say this ... it ain't me... This is only possible through the blood of
Jesus Christ and it is only because of His Grace which is truly sufficient (2
Corinthians 12:9). The Holy Spirit has
really taught me self-control and kept me during these 24 months.
I've
been asked if I’ve ever felt tempted
.. ahhh ..YES!! Mostly in the earlier stage... but I researched so many Blogs
and YouTube videos on Purity that I've learned to flee from sexual immorality (1
Corinthians 6:8). I ensure I don't put myself in certain
compromising situations that would tempt me to fall. I will share another blog
on Purity soon, but today I want to share 2 major lessons I've learnt during my
celibacy journey:
1) SEX DOES NOT EQUAL LOVE
I
didn't grow up in church, so not having sex before marriage was definitely not
taught to me. Personally, I just needed to wait until I was at least 16 years
old and ensured I didn't get pregnant or my father would kill me. Since I
didn't know the Author of Love, of course love was showed through SEX. After
being in a relationship for seven (7) years, I really wonder if either
of us really were in love because according to 1 Corinthians 13 .. that's a big
NOPE!! We failed that love test for sure!!
It is a
bit sad looking at it now, because the risks I took with my life of probably
catching HIV or STD ... dammm!!! SIN CAN REALLY BLIND YOU...
A man can be in love with the sex and not with
you. If you only went on a few dates he does not even really know you, he knows
what you show him. If you sleep with him that can clog up his thinking. That is
why later down the road when he realizes he wasn't in to you, he was just into
the sex, he moves on to the next one. A few dates or even a few years does not mean a man knows
you or loves you. So do it God's way. God will give you what you need.
I've learnt that a guy that truly cares about you will a) Wait for
sex - sex truly complicates things as we are driven by emotions and lust that
we are blinded from the true intentions of this person. b) If he really
wants you, he will put a ring on it! c) If he doesn't know God, he truly cannot
know love.
2) IF YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR WORTH, YOU WILL SETTLE FOR
ANYTHING.
My
worth was wrapped up in education, career and accomplishments. So I didn't even
realize that I didn't know who I was or what I was about. In order for us to
know our true worth, we must know GOD. When you know your worth, you will not
settle to be a man's side-chick, baby-momma, friend with benefits, 'ride n die'
or even his girlfriend... if that man truly wants you, he will make you his wife.
As mothers, it's obvious we have a certain level of sexual
experience and the enemy will try to use this to get you to start thinking that
you are not worth the wait. You can have 2 or 5 children, you are more than
worth it to GOD!! So you have to continuously renew your mind that you are a
new creation and God has completely restored and forgiven you. Look at these
Scriptures and see what God says about you .. and GOD is not man that He can
lie!!!
(Hosea 14:4, Ezekiel 36:25 & 2 Corinthians 5:17).
So today
I share this blog, not to seem like I have it all together because I'm a
work-in-progress... but I really want to encourage someone (male & female)
to choose Purity over Pleasure!
Sex might be pleasurable but the penalty
can be so detrimental. Sinning against your body (the temple of God) leaves so
much scars and can truly mess up you life. I am
telling you it can be done!!!
No body on this earth is worth your soul, and continuing to
indulge in fornication and sexual immorality has eternal penalties.
Purity is not a religious choice but it is something I choose to
do to show God how much I love Him and I love myself!
For my young ladies, please please please, I beg you wait!! Sex
really not running away and your vagina won't spoil (sorry to be so
forward)!!
It is so possible and it is so worth waiting on GOD to send you a husband who will honor you by marrying you before sharing your prize
possession.
GOD IS SOO FAITHFUL .... HE WORKS ALL THINGS TOGETHER FOR THOSE
WHO LOVES HIM!!
Who Son sets free is free indeed!!! |
God loves you so much... and I do too:-)
To God be the Glory****
Crystal
Feel free to email me: shachene@gmail.com
I'm not so lucky to have anyone to talk to. I'm an only child and I bare have close friends, so most of my thoughts or pain is kept to myself. But I have a question or questions that I would like to ask. I've never been in a relationship so I really don't know what to expect when it comes to one.
ReplyDelete1. How can you discern if a guy just wants you for sex and not a serious relationship?
2. Also if he shows no intention of wanting to let his parents known that you and him talk (because he doesn't want anyone in his business) what should you take from that?
3. Do you think that at a certain age a man should possess a certain civil and mature behaviour? In terms of being respectful to a woman, alcohol consumption and know that sex is not everything and that love needs to be shown in other ways.
4. Also if a man keeps hanging around men younger than him don't you think this would affect their trend of thoughts on life seeing that these young individuals are not at that level where they are ready to get a house, married or be a family person?
These are just somethings that are on my mind that I would like to get an answer to.
I'm not so lucky to have anyone to talk to. I'm an only child and I bare have close friends, so most of my thoughts or pain is kept to myself. But I have a question or questions that I would like to ask. I've never been in a relationship so I really don't know what to expect when it comes to one.
ReplyDelete1. How can you discern if a guy just wants you for sex and not a serious relationship?
2. Also if he shows no intention of wanting to let his parents known that you and him talk (because he doesn't want anyone in his business) what should you take from that?
3. Do you think that at a certain age a man should possess a certain civil and mature behaviour? In terms of being respectful to a woman, alcohol consumption and know that sex is not everything and that love needs to be shown in other ways.
4. Also if a man keeps hanging around men younger than him don't you think this would affect their trend of thoughts on life seeing that these young individuals are not at that level where they are ready to get a house, married or be a family person?
These are just somethings that are on my mind that I would like to get an answer to.