Rejection is something we all face in life. If we think simply about the things that we have 'rejected', it comes down to us perceiving this is not good enough and it's not valuable. This is why when we are rejected it is such a painful experience because it leaves us feeling less valuable and this hurts so much.
I could
make a list of so many circumstances where we have felt rejected, but I won't.
As you read this blog, I want you to personalize it. Think about some of the
times you have felt your deepest rejection and as you continue reading, I pray
you will apply it to your own life so today your healing/restoration process can
begin.
Being
rejected causes emotional and spiritual wounds. Some of these includes
unforgiveness, jealousy, envy, blaming God, low self-esteem, anger, depression,
bitterness, self-hatred, rebellion and revenge. It also affects us physically
like increase headaches, disrupts our sleep and can even leads to mental
illness (and if you have ever had a broken heart you can relate a bit
to these feelings). This tells you how important it is for us to deal
with rejection.
Not dealing with rejection can lead to a life of:
a) Feelings of worthlessness,
insecurity, or hopelessness
b) Fabricated personalities (being
somebody you aren't, in order to be accepted)
c) Fear of confrontation
d) Feeling the need to be overly
opinionated and need to always be right
e) Self-pity where a person feels
bad for themselves being all alone
f) Increase pride that says,
"How dare they reject me!"
g) Feelings of worthlessness,
insecurity, or hopelessness
h) Fear of correction because you
believe everyone is out to get you
i) Self-rejection (not liking
who you are and leads to further self-hate and self-resentment)
j) Constantly seeking approval of family
and friends over God
SIGH... Even as I write this
blog, the memories of rejection still hurt and explains why I make
some decisions that I've made in the past.
A life of rejection allows us to live for the approval of
others and when we do things to get others to applaud us and the thought of
letting people down leads us to say 'yes' to everything.
So how do we deal with
rejection? How do we overcome these feelings of needing others approval?
1) Accept
the rejection - Yes! I said it. Many times we live in denial
and try to hide these feelings then they fester into more deep rooted issues.
Think about a simple wound, if you don't deal with it and put band
aid over it, then it break out into sore which is harder to treat.
Admit that it does hurt and allow time to get over this situation.
2) Put God in first place - He's the only one who can ultimately meet
all your needs. You will never have all your needs met by any person or
group of people. Human love is limited; God's love is unlimited and
unconditional. No matter how deep your need is, he can fill it.
3) Reject the Rejection - Rejection
is only destructive when we internalize it. Since we cannot control what
other people think, we have no control over whether or not people approve of
us. We are only in control of our own attitudes and beliefs. If we allow the
opinions of others to affect the opinions we have of ourselves, then we are
allowing those who hurt us to control our thoughts. If we keep our thoughts
focused on how much God loves us, we won’t dwell on the opinions of others.
4) Forgive - If you hold on to
the hurt, it will only end up hurting you. When you don’t forgive others, it
creates bitterness and anger in you. Forgiveness is not about trusting the
person again or forgetting everything that happened. It’s about putting the
situation in God’s hands instead of seeking revenge or holding a grudge.
5) Understand that you are made in the image of God - Men and women are God’s most unique works of
art, His masterpieces! There is no one more valuable and precious than You (a
child of God). We can combat the destructive forces of rejection by
understanding our position in Christ. Spend time focusing on who we
matter to instead of who we don’t. During painful times in our life,
we can triumph if we remember that God is our strength. We do not need the
world’s approval, and we will never be able to please everyone. We only need
the approval of God.
I will stop for now, as I allow you to process these five
steps to overcoming rejection. Part 2 will be coming soon. But as I end this
blog, I want you to say this prayer as I declare that today is the beginning of
your restoration.
Prayer:
Father, I come to You in the name of Jesus. Lord Jesus, it is comforting to
know that You understand and sympathize with my weaknesses and this
excruciating pain of rejection. I ask You to forgive my sins, and I receive
Your mercy; I expect Your healing grace to dispel the rejection I am suffering
because of the false accusations and demeaning actions of others. Also, forgive
me for self-hatred and thinking that I’m less than others. It’s awesome to
understand that I’m created in Your image. Everything You make is good. In the
face of rejection I am declaring, “The Lord is my Light and my Salvation — whom
shall I fear or dread? The Lord is the Refuge and Stronghold of my life — of
whom shall I be afraid?” (Ps. 27:1). You chose me before the foundation of the
world and I am accepted by you, my Father. I give you all the glory in the name
of Your precious Son, Jesus!
May God
bless you my friends. Thank you so much for reading this blog.
To God to be Glory****
Crystal
Crystal
Feel free to email me with questions or concerns at
shachene@gmail.com
